G.I. Joe

We currently live in a world where society has stopped blinking incredulously at the mere idea of major film franchises based on the dumb toys you used to play with back in the ‘80s. So, it’s not too surprising that Hasbro is apparently examining the possibility of a big screen ‘GoBots’ revival.

I stand before you, humbled, and tasked with explaining, in comprehensible terms, just what the heck 'G.I. Joe: Retaliation' is all about. Attaining comprehensibility, however, is a chore the filmmakers didn't wrestle with, doubling-down on pure adrenaline and big movie star charisma. It's a risky move and sometimes it works. Sadly, this is not one of those cases. While there are chuckles to be ha