Guys, I'll be real with you here. If you want to read this at work and your work is pretty strict with stuff, you might want to save this til you get home.

I mean, we're not going to get TOO crazy around here, but.... just in case.  Maybe don't read this one on your lunch break at your desk.  Maybe read it on your phone or something when you get home.

via GIPHY

SO, here goes, you've been warned.  Every year, people apply for vanity license plates here in Missouri, as they do all around the country.  Most of the time, people want something simple, like  "DAD OF3" or "3MS MOM" or "NOH8IN", stuff like that.  But...those are the ones the DOR allows.  There are a ton that are rejected every year.

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And every year, the DOR puts out a list of what's been rejected.  This year, it was well over 400 different rejected plates.  Now some of them, you can easily tell why they were rejected - a little too close to 'cussin, a little too silly (meaning distracting), you know how it goes.

license plate
Robert Mizerek
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Some of them are downright hilarious, though.  So, I decided to list for you about twenty five of my "favorites", aka the Best of the Worst, in no particular order.  Here goes nothin!

  1. MURD3R
  2. SKEETE
  3. 5EXYAF
  4. AFUK1T
  5. PMS365
  6. T1DD1E
  7. B1MB0S
  8. FNTREX
  9. H1GHAF
  10. T1DDY
  11. DAMGRL
  12. LUMPET
  13. HAHA69
  14. LUVPIG
  15. MRFART
  16. B1GPMP
  17. D1DDLE
  18. NEED2P
  19. FNLOST
  20. PRVRTD
  21. PHUKHU
  22. BOOBYZ
  23. FWORDS
  24. HAVE2P
  25. PZSTFU

Guys. Some of these are just... well, I just can't imagine the person who tried really thought they would get away with it. I really think some of these were just submitted to make the clerks laugh.

But some of them... do you really want people to just.... think that about you?  That when you're driving by, you want them to think you're a murderer, or a pervert? That's the information you want someone to take away when they're sat behind you at a left turn?   I mean, some of it I can see.  You want people to know you're lost, or you really need to urinate, or that you're smoking the herbal jazz cigarettes. Or that you... love pigs.  Or the female anatomy.  Although with that last one, you might be a little TOO enthusiastic.  I don't think any adult woman has looked at a man's license plate, seen "BOOBYZ" and thought, "Wow.  This guy really respects women."

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But anyway, the best ones, to me, are the weird ones.  'FNTREX' is for the dinosaur enthusiast, I guess. 'FWORDS' also seems pretty random.  Like you want to cuss, but you also know you shouldn't, so you just say 'EF WORDS! EF EM ALL!". Also, though, a honorable mention should go to "PMS365".  That's a lady that's just warning you.  She's cranky, she's driving, and she's got a great reason to be mad at you right now.

Honestly though, my favorite is "MRFART".  It's simple, it's stupid, and frankly, maybe he's also low key trying to warn you not to spend a lot of time in his vehicle.  What were some of your favorites?  What's the funniest or strangest vanity license plate you've ever seen?

Licensely yours,
Behka

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