Alexa, Please Have the Nurse Come to My Room I Need Help!

When I saw the headline, "Amazon is putting Alexa next to hospital beds throughout the US". I thought what a horrible idea. What a way to make an already unpleasant experience more unpleasant.

According to Business Insider:

Amazon said that using Alexa-enabled devices in healthcare could mean staff don't need to enter patients' rooms unnecessarily. "This enables hospitals to increase productivity, conserve medical supplies and protective equipment, such as masks, gloves, and gowns, and free up staff time to provide more personalized care," it said.

Right. Because patients need to see their nurses, doctors, and patient care techs less than they do already. My wife spent three weeks in the hospital over the summer, and I can tell you, an Amazon Alexa isn't something she needed. And for two of the three weeks, she was either in too much pain or too out of it to probably use a voice-activated virtual assistant.

In fact, she and her patient care techs and nurses had problems communicating through the high-tech cell phone-looking devices that they carried because there was a problem with the device my wife was using. And honestly, when you need your pain medication or need to be adjusted in the bed so you'll be in less pain. A cherry nurse or tech saying he or she will be there soon isn't much comfort. My experience with Amazon's Alexa gives me little hope it'd be any better than what hospitals already have. In fact, I think It would probably be worse based on my experience.

Peachy Hain, Executive Director of Medical and Surgical Services at Cedars-Sinai, one of the hospitals using the technology told Business Insider:

"Regardless of age or tech-savviness," patients can use Alexa to "connect with their care team and stay entertained as soon as they settle in, while care providers can streamline tasks to make more time to care for those patients," she said.

I'll believe that when I see it. Business Insider's headline explains exactly why hospitals will equip rooms with the technology: "Amazon is putting Alexa next to hospital beds throughout the US. It says it will boost productivity because staff can go into patients' rooms less."

Yes, it'll boost worker productivity because staff can go into patients' rooms less. That sounds like a win for no one but hospital beancounters to me.